I used to say the words “all men are cheaters” and sadly I believed it too. I used to feel sick to my stomach when my boyfriend would go out without me. I would actually convince myself that he must be out cheating on me. I would worry all night long until his return and then question him on his whereabouts like I was cross-examining a witness.
I used to take every opportunity I had to go through his cell phone, facebook, email, you name it, because I was convinced I would find out he was talking to some other girl. I would worry he would never want to marry me. I secretly felt deep down that I loved him more than he loved me.
I felt helpless to all these feelings. I thought that I couldn’t control my snooping, worrying, questioning, and looked for a man who would squash all my fears, “the one”, so I could live happily ever after.
I did find “the one” and he was everything I had always looked for, except for one thing; no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t squash my fears and anxieties about cheating, and about feeling good enough, and about being comfortable in my own skin.
Do you want to know why? Because it was impossible. No man can, no matter how sweet and understanding he is. Those fears and anxieties are your own. You own them and only you can squash them.
Oh and by the way, you can squash them.
In fact the only reason you haven’t been able to is because you have never taken responsibility for them. It was your past relationships, it was your parent’s divorce, it was your upbringing, it’s him, it’s them, it’s not you, right?
Well I want to be in your face a little bit and tell you it is your responsibility to fix your insecurities. Because if you don’t “the one” will slip right through your fingers for someone else who believes that he is actually a pretty good guy and someone he doesn’t have to convince of his love every single day.
So… take a deep breath and follow my blog. I have been there, I can help you, and you can have love without fear.
p.s. If this stuff really hits home for you I would love to hear from you. Please drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org